In my counselling work in Plymouth, I often see how these hidden patterns in relationships can quietly shape how you respond, leaving you feeling drained, frustrated, or without a real sense of voice.
Do you have someone in your life who drains you, but you still keep showing up for them?
You tell yourself “this time I’ll handle it differently”, but it ends up going the same way.
They talk.
You listen.
They need.
You give.
And somehow, your needs don’t make it into the room.
You might go in already feeling a bit tense, knowing you’ll have to manage the conversation, keep things calm, not rock the boat.
Maybe you’ve tried to speak up before, but you end up backing down, softening it, or questioning yourself.
Afterwards, you’re left feeling exhausted, sometimes frustrated, sometimes wondering, “why do I keep ending up here?”
You might even notice moments where the irritation slips out, a sharper tone, a shorter response, and then you feel bad for that too. It can start to feel like you don’t quite have a voice in that relationship. Or that things somehow become your fault, even when you’re not sure how.
And yet you stay in the same position. Not because you’re weak, but because these patterns can be deeply familiar.
We don’t always realise we’re stepping into the same role, again and again, especially with certain people. And shifting that takes more than just “trying harder.”
If this hits a bit close to home and you recognise these kinds of relationship dynamics, you’re very welcome to get in touch.
I offer counselling in Plymouth and online, providing a calm, supportive space to explore patterns in relationships, communication, and the changes you may want to make.